Trust me I understand. I know what its like I felt it. You don't think so take a walk in my shoes. Feelings inside so deep you could burst a blood vessel before you hit the bottom. Words streaming through the soul belonging on print, screen or parchment. We are a generation of thinkers of bloggers of the people who want to be different but we are all looking for something.

Who has found it? not I, I search everyday under rock, chair, kitchen table, on closet floors under beds. I look and I look and I look, but to no avail. I am writing a book I just started it. The first chapter is called loss because thats the one thing all humans have in common the ability to lose. I strive to be different Just so I can fit in "lol" irionic isnt it. Thats the perfect definition for humanity irony. It's what we represented for so long for all time you can say. thoughts so advance you need a crystal ball to get it. I always wanted to be a rapper never had the talent Ill settle for a writer. portraying the same thoughts I would have in my raps if only I could rhyme I would be rich. I'll settle for my thoughts just being portrayed. 4 loko is the muse. contemplation is the enemy. love is the constant.

dry cry even tear.

I'm a mess right now. Its like you have high's and low's. At one point your soaring and you may never come down. Then just like that your below low and everything sucks and it hurts again.

I need a preeminent distraction not momentary reprieves. Im crying out for help right now anything anybody please help I could use it. its just one of those nights.

Light a cigarette after this one.

Ladies and Gents, strap in (no pun intended). Put your seat belts on put your tray table in the upright position and get ready for take off. SEX! Pure unbridled hedonistic, Animalistic, Hair pulling, biting, scratching, yelling, moaning, slow down, SPEEED UP! orgasm at the same time SEX. you both know its gonna happen you seen into the future and no longer want to live in the past. you can feel the goosebumps appear on the sides of your arms you can feel the blood rush to your heart and other unseemly parts of the body. no distractions perfect harmony nothing needs to be said but names and yells of passion. for a brief moment you rule the universe, you own the skies and the seas. Everything bows down before you. In that moment when time stands still that person makes you feel like a god or a goddess nay you make yourself feel like a god. When everything just seems to fall into place no awkward silences or moments, not even looking away. Staring into that persons soul and the gateway being her/his eyes you are naked not only baring your body but your soul your insecurities your fantasies your fallacies your triumphs. Not only sharing your body but your soul. I strive for this. I need this. I for a brief moment I am part of creation. I am creating. Every second feels like an eternity, every kiss is perfection, every action accepted. Every muscle moving in unison. I too hope one day you can share in the bliss the moment when you realize life is grand.